“At our house we honor complexity and integration. We believe in being whole. We invite every tangled, stranded, bright, rusty, loved, neglected part of you to be with all the silent, screaming, shining parts of us.
Come be perfect and broken and gardening.
Come be perfect and broken and dancing.
We welcome you and your grief, whatever shape you’re in.
Let’s make a place where we can practice being alive and complicated, together. Welcome. Let yourself in.”
(Portland Grief House website)
For care-experienced individuals, grief often takes many forms—the grief of separations, losses and endings; and unmet longing for parental care or a sense of home never realized. It’s a profound and ongoing part of the journey. Recognizing this, I made it a priority to explore grief and grief support throughout my fellowship travels.
This journey began with a weekend visit to an Open House event at the beautiful and welcoming Portland Grief House.
The Grief House was founded by Laura Green and Sasha Demerjian. Laura shared that after experiencing a number of losses and struggling to find a place to help her to be with and make sense of her feelings, she was inspired to create her own healing space. Initially this took the form of online gatherings, but later, following the death of her mother, Laura felt that her mother’s house was a fitting place to open up to the community and to further her healing journey.
Portland Grief House welcomes individuals healing from any type of loss. It offers opportunities to connect with others in shared grief, while also providing quiet spaces for solitude and reflection. Central to its mission, is the creation of a supportive community where grief can be openly expressed, witnessed, and ultimately integrated.
Laura kindly gave me a tour of the house. Each room was carefully curated to provide a nurturing and homely space, offering different ways to connect to and process feelings.
There was local artwork displayed on the walls, places to remember loved ones via writing (both privately and openly), art materials, games, a community bookshelf, yoga and massage space and a wishing tree. There was also a large and vibrant garden, set up for a grief spill event later that day and somewhere amidst the greenery some chickens!
Laura discussed that the grief house offered a number of gatherings both in person and online. These included: grief care groups; grief spills; dream groups; compassionate witnessing grief circles; open house events and ‘the lost table’ (bringing people together to share their grief over a meal). There were also restorative grief yoga classes and one-to-one grief support options.
What resonated most with me was the Grief House’s holistic approach. It acknowledges grief as something that touches every part of us—body, mind, and spirit. By providing a space where people can express their feelings, connect with others, and engage in creative and restorative practices, the Grief House helps individuals integrate their grief into their wider sense of self.
With my heartfelt thanks to Laura and Hilary (pictured above) for their openness and time.